Oh How She has Grown

Rylee leaving the hospital Sunday, August 3:

Rylee after church on Sunday, October 19 - 11 weeks later:

Zachary's Office

When we drive down the Dallas North Tollway, Zachary consistently points at the Dillard’s at the Shops of Willow Bend mall and says “That’s my office!” or “That’s my work!” He also calls the Cinemark Theater a castle but that is for another time.
Today, Zachary and I (Chad) were near Willow Bend and had some spare time, so I drove over to Dillard’s.
WE got out, and Z matter-of-factly states, “we’re at my office, Daddy!”
Unlike our usual shopping trips, I let Zachary lead the way to wander around the store. He had full reign to look at whatever he wanted. The only section I did steer him away was from the bridal registry area. Hollilop sticky hands, an urge to grab, and crystal just don’t mix.
We walk into the housewares section. Z was so excited that the Christmas displays were out (it’s mid-October). We proceed to walk through all the kitchen items, with Z claiming all of his ‘new special things’. The sales clerk, amused at all this (and totally bored with stocking), asked to be Zachary’s secretary.
He proceeded through the furniture. I got to sit at Zachary’s desk and on his ‘new special couch’. We saw his ‘new special chair’, his ‘new special table’, his ‘new special closet’
We had to ride the Al-e-gaaa-ter (escalator) up, and then look through the purses for mommy (editor’s note: don't get any ideas...).
Z took off for the mall entry, and we wound up at the main court. We had to ride the glass El-a-gaaa-ter (elevator) and look at the machine below.
Then- Zachary spotted the food court. ‘That’s where I eat lunch!” We toured around looking at every vendor. After pizza and Japanese didn’t thrill him, I spotted Bluebell. I said, ”That one has ice cream.” Without hesitation, Z ran up to the counter and ordered, “I want a scoop of chocolate ice cream pleeeeze.” He’s three. Geez.

(EATING ICE CREAM AT HIS "OFFICE")
After ice cream, we wandered through a couple of stores (sorry FootAction and Hot Topic) and made our way back to Dillard’s. Z picked out a gray on gray shirt for me (little scary how well he knows me [at 3]!)
As we were leaving Dillard’s, I asked, “Did you like your work?”
Zachary responded, “That’s not my work, that’s my office. THAT (Saks Fifth Avenue across the lot) is my work.” I guess we never caught the subtlety. If only he got the employee discounts…

Good-bye Ms. Carrie

September 17th was an emotional day for me. But only me. Zachary, Carrie, Rylee, Chad - no one recognizes the day as anything other than a day. It was Zachary's last day at Ms. Carries. A few weeks earlier, we gave Carrie -- also known as Ms. Carrie from Carries House Daycare (http://www.carrieshouse.com/) -- our two week notice and Zachary's offical last day would be September 19, 2008 (although she ended up closing for the 18th and 19th.) Two years and three months after he started on June 19, 2006.

(EARLY DAYS AT MS. CARRIES)

When we dropped off Zachary for the first time at Ms. Carries he was so little. He had been going to a friend's house, but she was getting ready to have her third child so it was time for Z to move on to a new place. We found Ms. Carrie by going through the Texas Family Services. Carrie is licensed and registered and a mile from our home. Perfect criteria for us. We went for an interview and Zachary was immediately comfortable.

I never had apprehension dropping him off those early years. Carrie said he was a good boy but he did take a while to warm up to his new situation. By the end of the summer, Zachary was using sign language to say please, more, eat and I was very impressed.

(ZACHARY SAYING PLEASE IN SIGN LANGUAGE)

The next years for Zachary were great. He learned so much and had fun and made the cutest things. Carrie also made little things for the parents on holidays that included pictures. She also sent us pictures she took during the day via Snapfish so we could see what he was up to. I loved seeing him at play or cutting or painting. I could not have asked for better care for my son.

Zachary had developed good relationships with the others at Carries -- they were like a little gang! When Zachary started at 16 months, he joined Devon (2yrs), Grant (2 yrs), Kaylee (14 months), Emma (10 months), Kylie (almost a year), and Sofie (8 months). Olivia arrived at Ms. Carries shortly after and is three months younger than Z. This little group stayed in tact for quite a while we lost Grant and Kaylee along the way but Zachary had the others in his daily world until last spring. Devon, Sofie and Kylie all went to another in home daycare.

(THE CARRIE'S HOUSE KIDDOS SUMMER 2006)

(THE CARRIES HOUSE KIDDOS OCTOBER 2007)

(THE CARRIE'S HOUSE KIDDOS FEBRUARY 2008)

Over time, Chad and I also developed relationships with this little gang's parents. We started having bbqs and dropping our kids off to be watch for a date night. We grew so comfy and we are so grateful for their friendship.

Soon after Z turn 2, Carrie did ask when we were sending him to preschool. We hadn't intended to do anything until he was four but were shocked by her request. She didn't push the issue but at 3 she said she really felt like he was ready.

In June of 2008, Carrie closed for a week of vacation and we had no where to put our poor child. Because of Rylee's impending birth the grandmothers were saving vacation, I had no vacation to spare because of my upcoming mat leave, and Chad had a humongous project do and couldn't be out of the office. In desperation, we decided to pay an obscene amount of money to send him to TLC the daycare where my boss sends her daughter. We had to pay like we were enrolling him so even though he was only staying a week we paid the enrollment/admission fee, the supply fee, and the tuition.

It was worth it -- he LOVED it. Every day was "the best day ever" according to him. We (read I) was worried how he would do and we tried to talk up "school" to prepare him but he did just fine. Actually I think he excelled. Even back at Carrie's, he talked about how fun school is. I think Carrie took this as a cue and asked again when he was going to preschool because he was definitely ready.

I must at this time step backwards again -- cuz the blog entry just isn't log enough - and bring Rylee into the picture a bit. We told Carrie in February (the 21st to be exact) that we were pregnant and wanted her to come to Carrie's house. She said she would put her on the list but couldn't guarantee anything because she didn't know what would change before Rylee's arrival. But we could put a deposit down a month before she was to start and hold a spot. Chad said that maybe Rylee could take Z's spot and we'll leave him there until she was born. Carrie explained that it doesn't work that way. The state has certain ratios and she can keep one infant or two toddlers. So Chad told her to let us know if she felt like she was getting full and we may put a deposit down then.

Fast forward again to June and my response to Carrie was that we would be pulling Z in the next coming months but weren't sure exactly when because of Rylee. We didn't know if we should pull him before she is born so his schedule can stabilize before she was born or wait until she starts Ms. Carrie's and let me kind of mentor her in and he could "watch out" for her for awhile.

Essentially, I hemmed and hawed for a long time and couldn't decide. So Z just kept going to Carries.

The week after Rylee was born, Carrie took on three toddlers. Chad and I didn't think twice about it because we assumed Carrie would tell us she was getting full.

After a couple of weeks on mat leave, I started picking up Z from Carries. I would bring in Rylee and talk with Carrie and the other parents. I talked about her temperament and told Carrie Rylee would be a good girl for Carrie. I told Carrie that Rylee's diapers were those yellow ones and Carrie would have fun with those. Carrie didn't say a word.

Then about the last week of August when I was picking up Z, Carrie asked me about Zachary's curriculum fee. She said that if he was leaving then it wouldn't be worth it for us to pay it. I apologized that we hadn't gotten back to her on the whole is he staying or going. I told her we would let her know for sure by the weekend if we were going to let him stay at Carries with Rylee for awhile or pull him and just send her.

It was then Carrie looked at me and in front of the kids and other parents said "I am not taking Rylee. I just took on three new kids." The devastation and pain I felt in that moment was unreal. (looking back it had a lot to do with hormones too!!) I can't imagine the face I must have made because she said "I told you I might not be able to take her." I turned to leave because I was about to break down into full on meltdown mode. I sucked back tears like I never have in my life.

Of course at that moment one of the mothers I adore walks up with a gift for Rylee and I have to grab the bag and run with the lamest thank you ever tossed at her. I am quite sure Emily was a little freaked.

I get in the car and try not to let Z know I am bawling. He is just talking about his day and I am not listening to a word. Again my hormones were in full swing! But I truly was so hurt that my heart broke. I couldn't look at Carrie the next few days.

Then I got mad. HOW could she take on three new kids knowing we were planning on bringing Rylee? When was she planning on telling us - when I dropped her off my first day back a work??? I than began thinking she planned this. She was tired of Zachary and forced our hand to remove him from her daycare. It's not like we would leave Z there and send Rylee somewhere else.

OK so perhaps I was a little paranoid, a lot hormonal, and just sad that my daughter wouldn't get this personal care I loved.

My boss Amy sent me the best note ever. She point these things out about Rylee going to TLC:

Look at it this way:
*She wont be around other children who are much bigger than her so she can’t get hurt
*Think of all the free vacation time you will have back by not ever having to take off because TLC won’t close like she will
*Think of all the gas and time you will save by having one location to pick up and drop off at
*Emma is just next door so she can come over to check on little Rylee if she needs a friend
*That witch director won’t always manage TLC
*TLC is very pro booby milk

God bless you Amy!

It took a good three weeks to get to a point where I can look at it a little less biased. I needed to look at it from Carrie's perspective. This daycare is her business. She is in it to survive and make money. The economy is for crap right now. She can make more money with three toddlers than with one infant. It just made good business sense. So I came up with a phrase that if I do say so myself belongs in a calendar or quote book somewhere:

Carrie didn't do this to me. Carrie did this for her.

I feel so blessed that Zachary got the time with her that he did. And he was so ready to move on academically and socially - everything happens for a reason right?

Last week on the way home from school, Zachary started saying something about when he goes back to Ms. Carrie’s house. I told him that he wasn’t going back to Ms. Carrie’s house and he said very sadly “Oh. OK.” So I asked him do you not like school? And he said “No I LOVE school – it is fun. I just really miss Ms. Carrie.”

So Ms. Carrie thank you for taking care of our most precious treasure and teaching him all the things you did. He is definitely better for it. We do miss you.

(ZACHARY AND MS. CARRIE)

Christmas Cussing

My innocent sweet boy recently started using the word "Donner." All I could think of was the reindeer. I know he remembers Christmas and definitely knows who Santa is but could he really possibly remember Santa's reindeer.

So after a few more time of hearing him say "donner" I had to ask for clarification. I asked him what he was saying and he clearly stated " I am saying donner." I asked him what donner meant and he said "that I dropped something."

Confused about the mind of my three year old, I decided to let it go. I wasn't sure what to do with his statement so I said ok and left it at that. He apparently sensed my confusion and stopped me with "Mommy YOU say donner."

Now I can't decide if his imagination is at play here or is it that I am not getting it.

He continued "When you drop something Mommy you say donner." I looked at him for a few minutes and said "I do?"

He shook his head and said that I did. As I looked at him the preverbial light bulb went off in my head. I say "Darn it." He was copying me and my potty mouth (HA!) When I figured out what was going on, I knew I didn't want him saying donner. I recognize that darn it doesn't go down as the harshest of cursing but when a three year old says the phrase it just doesn't sound right.

So quick thinking Mommy said "Zachary I don't think you or I should say donner anymore. How about Oopsy Daisy?" I know! I know! A little too on the vanilla side but it sounds cute coming from him.

He agreed and a few days later sure enough he had a situation that required a cuss word and he said "I would say donner but now I say Oopsy Daisy."

I can put the bar of soap away for now.

Some Rylee Catch Up

Seeing that it took me so long to actually post Rylee's birth, the statics listed in yesterday's post are not exactly accurate. So here is a brief timeline to prove what we already know - she is healthy and growing fast:

July 31 - Rylee is born
7 lbs 14 oz
19 1/4 inches

August 3 - Rylee leaves the hospital
7 lbs 4 oz

August 6 - Her 48 hr follow up at the insistence of the Autistic Pediatrician (another story for another day)
7 lbs 7 oz

September 11 - Pertussis Visit (Sick kid at Ms. Carries so both kids got to go!)
11 lbs 13 oz (75%)

SIDE NOTE: Zachary is 37 lbs (75% -- consistent family huh?)

September 22 - Her 2 month Checkup
12 lbs 3 oz (75%)
23 1/2 inches (75%)

More fun facts:

* She did roll over twice (tummy to back) at Dr. Berger's and once at home for Chad but hasn't done it again.

* She smiled for the first time on Saturday, September 13 and captured on film Sunday, September 14

* She slept six hours on Thursday, September 25 and then on Sunday, September 28th (the night before my first day back from Maternity Leave) the beautiful thoughtful girl slept from 10:30 to 5:30!! THANK YOU Rylee!! She has been pretty consistent since then sleeping seven to nine hours a night. Have I said THANK YOU enough yet?!

* She is getting closer and closer to sucking her thumb. Chad and I keep popping it out and sticking in the pacifier...we are working with the philosophy you can take away a pacifier but not a thumb

* Her first day of school was Monday, September 29 and she slept a lot and decided to be a challenge taking a bottle. I'll just take it as a compliment that she prefers to eat with her mom!

* I dropped her off today in the outfit she wore home from the hospital. 2 1/2 months ago it hit her ankles - today above her knee. CRAZY!

I think that is the majority of the updates. Chad can add his here too. I do find it odd that she measured 19 1/4 inches when born but 53 days later she was 4 1/4 inches longer. So instead of saying she grew 4 inches, I say she stretched 4 1/2 inches. I am sure I am the only one that finds that amusing.

I will close this post with evidence of my technological ignorance -- I do not know how to format photos into the post. Notta clue. So they are all at the beginning when they would be much more effective if placed where they fit into the blog. So now I have to describe them:

1. Rylee's first day of school at TLC

2. Rylee and Zachary at Dr. Berger's for the pertussis check up

3. Rylee's first smile

Sigh...I am sure it will be Zachary or Rylee that will show me how to do this correctly...you know it's true!

ADDED BONUS -- now the formatting is wonky!

Zachary and his Little Girl

Part of me wants to air out my own neuroses and have some therapy about how we are scarring Zachary since the birth of his sister - how he doesn't get much play time, how he desperately wants our attention, and how the only things out of my mouth to him these days is "don't touch her" or "be gentle" or flat out "Zachary - DON'T!" But it seems that no one really seems to care that my son will be emotionally damaged by his parents since Rylee's arrival -- no they want to hear how he interacts with Rylee. So since this blog is supposed to be about the kids, I guess my guilt ridden tirade will have to wait.

He is the most loving adoring big brother. That is what you wanted to hear isn't it? I know it is. That is all anyone wants to hear. However in this case, it is absolutely 100% true.

He loves on Rylee so much and wants to touch and hug and feed and hold and play so much he can hardly contain himself. For awhile, Z referred to Rylee as his baby. In the early weeks, we let him hold her and give her a bottle but since we hover and limit his time, he decided that his beloved puppy was "mommy's sister" and decided to care for puppy like we did for Rylee. Yes, puppy wears a diaper that he changes (we have lost so many unused diapers because he throws puppy's diapers away in the real diaper pail!) and puppy sleeps in Rylee's crib to watch the "noble" (translate to mobile.) He also likes to feed puppy (forgive me Zachary for typing this -- promise to take it down before any of your friends can read!) by nursing (yep pulls up his shirt and everything) or bottle and has to pump to get milk for puppy. Chad wants to take a picture of Z pumping but I fear for when Z is older and the picture goes public.

These days he doesn't pump or change puppy's diaper (though the darn thing still wears one!) but Zachary is still just as loving despite Chad and I constantly on him about what he does with her.

I think once of the funniest and sweetest things he does is talk for her. It cracks me up and makes me go AAHHHH when he does it. He uses a high pitched falsetto voice and speaks for her as thought she is talking. For example, when I burp her and she belches like she shotgunned a Budweiser, Zachary will say in a high pitch fake voice "Excuse Me" or if I talk to Rylee and ask her a question "Are you ready for bed" or "Do you have a dirty diaper?" Zachary will answer for her. Sometimes she has stories to tell or sometimes it is a simple yes or no but it definitely needs to be captured on film. Too bad he has gotten so shy about the camera.

So I have followed his lead and make sure that she "tells" Zachary everyday that she loves him.

She is now his Little Girl. He and Chad go round and round because Chad calls her "Little One" and Zachary gets frustrated and says "No Daddy - it's Little Girl." He hardly even calls her Rylee anymore. The teachers at daycare (oh yeah - both kids are at TLC now - a long drama filled blog for another day) love that he talks to and about his Little Girl.

In the end, while I still feel there is some baggage we've handed to our son, he is truly a wonderful big brother. But knowing who he is, an amazing sweet loving boy, we aren't really that surprised.

She's Here!!

On July 31st (yes that was 2 1/2 months ago -- give a new mother a break!) at 8:08 am, our darling Rylee Elizabeth entered this world at 7 lbs 14 oz and 19 1/4 inches. She was screaming before Dr. Krum could get her out fully! (Apparently C-section babies have a harder time clearing out the lungs of goo and crying helps this process)

She is named after my maternal grandmother - Mary Lee Zerngast and Chad's paternal grandmother Beth Martin.

We really love using the name Lee because it also includes two very important women in our lives Leigh Anne Rathbun and Jessica Lee Espinoza. It truly means so much that we could give them Rylee as a name sake.

The Elizabeth (or as Emily Farr calls her Rylee "A Little Bit" Martin) portion of her name also ties her back to my mother's maternal grandmother, Elizabeth Burkhart and my father's maternal grandmother, Elizabeth Collins.

So Rylee will have a sense of family and love with all those strong amazing women whose names she carries.