Showing My Blue Color

I guess it is time that I came out of the closet. Some of you already know, some suspect, but I think most of you are going to be shocked:

I am a conservative liberal.

What does this mean? I voted for Barack Obama and am so thrilled he won. I don’t agree with all his points but more often than not we see eye to eye on things.

Some may question why this is a big deal however the ten of you that actually read this blog are probably already aware of why that is a big deal. I count on our friendship remaining in tact after this admission but know that it could be changed.

(OBAMA SPEAKING IN DENVER photo by Jamey Leonard - thanks bro!)

I have never been one to discuss politics for several reasons. I don’t always feel educated on all of the topics enough to debate someone. Passions run so high where politics are concerned that generally speaking you are not going to convert someone to your way of thinking so why even get in a discussion where you end up getting mad and frustrated. I am also a Catholic in Texas which means I am surrounded by people who overall do not view politics with the same eye as me. It boils down to I am a chicken and avoid wearing an indication of blue on my sleeve.

I really get angry though at some of the statements I hear. How now people are praying for our country because of the election results – why weren’t they praying all along??? Or how Obama will be known as “the Abortion President.” Really? That is what his legacy is going to be? YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING!!! I recognize it is my own fault that I sit in silence seething at the remarks made about Democrats or how the country is now dead because Obama will be president. (There is a guy in the metroplex that actually hung a black flag {symbol of death} over an upside down American flag {symbol of distress} in protest of the election.) I do not have the confidence to out myself in this environment.

Up to the election, I received tons of emails (didn’t we all!) on how Obama is evil or for the sake of my children I have to vote for McCain. These emails came from my friends. On Facebook, I had friends say how proud they are that their kids voted for McCain in the school election or use their status update for McCain publicity. Please understand that I fully support their right to pick the candidate that works for them. If McCain is the candidate that is aligned closest to their beliefs, then I do expect them to support, campaign for, and vote for McCain. However, I did not feel I had the same option.

On Tuesday, November 4 at about 8:30 west coast time, I was sitting with my boss and another person for dinner when Chad texted me “McCain conceded.” My boss did not believe me and had me call Chad to verify. I was so excited but dare not say a word. My boss is a vocal Republican so I cheered in my head and let them discuss this turn of events.

I really do feel this is a risky move to make my political thoughts public. I have a friend I have known for years that a while back sent me an email to boycott a toy company. I want to say that it was American Girl (don’t quote me on it!) that supported a shelter or after school club or some organization for at risk girls to help them create a future. Although not the primary function of the group, the reason I was to boycott it was because they provide a safe environment for girls that are lesbians and they also provide counseling for those who had an abortion. The email called for me to boycott the company and to pass along to all in my address book. I wrote back to my friend and said that I could not pass the email along for I thought the organization’s goals sounded like good ones. She responded with something that amounted to “then you are not who I thought you were.”

My family even wasn’t sure where I stood. My mother-in-law was shocked to find out that I was happy to have Obama as president. My brother (a VERY outed liberal) said he wasn’t really sure what side of the fence I was on for the election. It was at that time I decided to write this entry.

I want my children to have confidence in their beliefs and stand by their decisions even if they are in the minority. I did my research for the election. I compared the candidates and their stances. I find that Obama and the more liberal positions represent my views best. Why am I so afraid to say that? Am I a bad Catholic or bad Christian? Am I getting booted out of Texas?? The repercussion will be my friends will now look at me differently because “I am not who they thought I was.” It is hard to swallow that people may lose respect for me based on my liberal views. As a people pleaser and someone who cherishes my relationship with God, I really struggle with this. I guess I could be blowing this out of proportion but I know some of my Catholic and/or Texas friends will shake their heads in disappointment. I should take a step back here though. I should also consider giving credit to my friends that may just shrug their shoulders and say “whatever – let’s agree to disagree.” I just feel like that won’t happen as much as I want it to.

So now I stand before you ten people that read this blog and anyone else that stumbles upon it feeling very vulnerable to criticism and judgment. I will be stronger for it. I am so proud to be one of those that help put Obama in the oval office. I want Zachary and Rylee to know that I am part of that history – not just the first African American but the one that will bring freshness and energy to the position. I will try to wear more blue.

I appreciate the support some of you gave me for branching out on this blog to more than just kiddo stories. Maybe next time I’ll pick a topic less controversial like the war in Iraq or religion! HA!