Friday, May 30, 2014

Then Maybe You Shouldn't Wear a Stork Dress

I love US magazine.  Totally shallow borderline shady stalker magazine.  Not sure about my fascination with it.  Stars as “real people” doing “real things” – they are just like US!   It is a quick read – I really should put quotes around the word read – and I guess it feeds my vice of gossip and voyeurism all at once.  I am not proud that I find enjoyment in the stalking of others and I remember when Princess Diana died I had a guilt that hung over me for a while.  But I kept buying the magazines and now I even have a subscription.  I’d like to think I am not a shallow person but apparently there is a secret part of me that is.

I have had another dilemma arise from my habit.  There is a section in this trashy magazine called the Fashion Police where about eight different comedians/bloggers comment on some unusual outfits worn by the rich and famous.  And when I say comment I do not mean they are supportive and complimentary – they are snarky and ugly and yes I usually giggle at more than a few of their comments and wonder why in the heck someone rich and famous would choose to dress like that.  I look forward to that section with every magazine.

Then I read this:

Sarah Millican at the BAFTAS

ACKKK!!!  Good lord – the guilt – I am one of THOSE people.   I do understand what Sarah Millican was wearing  does not have the shock/horror value as Bjork’s Stork outfit and to defend myself I see nothing wrong with her gown and I don’t always have an issue with the dresses in the Fashion Police section that the commentators seem to have.  But dear lord in heaven – another thing to add to my list of guilts.

Kim Kardashian – a name that is nails to a chalk board in my soul, a name that makes bile creep up my throat, and a name that starts a storm of outrage and hatred in my head.  However, I have never met Kim.  So my irritation that actually borders on hatred with this self-obsessed, dimwitted, blindingly wealthy for no good reason, waste of space individual is beyond irrational.  I mean come on if I found out Kim was saying these things about me cuz she looked at my FB page and saw some pictures of me I would come unglued.  She doesn’t know me or my heart or my family.  And words to hurt – don’t believe the hype.  It seems my behavior has crossed the Judgy McJudgersen line way deep into extreme hypocritical territory.

I suppose if I really wanted to psycho analyze my issues here we should start with my loathing of Kim Kardasian (where the heehaw does it come from?!?) but the idea of that is too exhausting.  And I am not willing to explore the “they chose to be famous so they can deal with the consequences” approach because I do not embrace that in its entirety.  So I can choose to give up my vice and cancel my subscription and take the high road, setting a good example for my kids, or I can continue to enjoy seeing stars trying to lead a normal life while being photographed and maniacally laugh at hideous fashion choices by people critics deem should know better all the while thankful no one captures my bad hair days for the world to see. 

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